LAZYgunsBRISKY review? Really? Man, screw that, I’d rather wax philosophical on Morning Musume for the umpteenth time. There’s something captivating about their latest single, the big 40th, “Nanchatte Renai”, that I feel it’s necessary to not only review the song itself…but to take a good look at the PV(with screenshots)!

Ya’ll know Momusu just doesn’t delight me like it used to. I can barely count the number of articles that I’ve written on this blog professing my blatant love/hate relationship with them, and that, depending on the circumstances, I can either swing into total disdain or adoration for them. Usually it tends to be disdain, but I’m not entirely alone in that sentiment — there’s plenty of Hello! Project fans who may as well not even be fans. I don’t disagree with the notion that I’m often somewhat an anti-fan of Momusu. I embrace that, it’s cool with me.

“Mikan” is easily the biggest failure of Momusu’s career, I didn’t like “Resonant Blue” at all, “Pepper Keibu” tried and failed to be a good disco throwback, “Naichau Kamo” was a boring synthetic pop song, and “Shouganai Yume Oibito” has beautiful vocals but the instrumental weakens it tremendously. When I list it like this, it looks like such a string of disappointments — it is. The whole 2008-2009 period, up until now, I have been waiting for something that might up the ante even slightly. “Nanchatte Renai” is not a sterling representative of a Morning Musume single, but it definitely kicks the asses of all that has come before it.

When I initially downloaded my radio rip of it, I couldn’t stop playing it over and over. There are flaws, of course (flaws have been a given in every Momusu single since, like, 2006). I wish that the composition and arrangement of the instrumental was less generic. I wish that, instead of following up Ai’s final “honmono ni” line with more of said boring instrumental, they had left it off there for a powerful finish. I wish the rap had been done better. I wish the choreography of the dance was more powerful, more ‘in your face’, rather than fanciful and faintly ballerina-esque. If someone could come in and fix all the things I dislike about this single, it would probably be one of my ultimate favorites from Momusu. As it stands, it’s pretty damn close, which is admirable given, as I said before, what an anti-fan I tend to be.

Of course, the PV always helps.

I like the stylization of the song title. So far, so good.

The setting for the dance shot is absolutely seeping with moodiness a la Morning Musume’s earlier PVs, like “Summer Night Town” and “Memory Seishun no Hikari” (which, as a footnote, this is the second Momusu single release that has two B-sides; the first was “Memory”). I love it, I’m happy that Up-Front had at least enough money left to rent out an old, shitty warehouse. It’s not the upscale, shiny hallway I think this PV should’ve been filmed in given the sparkly ballerina dance moves and shimmery fake instrumental, but it gives the song a darker tone. My eyes were going everywhere — from the pillars to the windows, the walls and ceiling, the random furnishings, back to the Momusu members. Definitely an engaging set.

What surprised me most was the early solo shot of Junjun. I normally don’t expect to see the eighth generation too much, but they were definitely given some time here with the rapping segments, another positive aspect to the song and PV. I often tend to regard eighth-gen as “my” generation of Momusu, since I was there shortly after Aika was inducted and before China-tachi appeared. They may not be the best generation, but I can always find something to appreciate about each one, whether it’s Lin’s talent, Aika’s versatility, or Jun’s beauty.

I’ve noticed a lot of people saying this, but Koharu has truly started to look fabulous. Her face is nicely proportioned and she has height comparable to that of mainstream models. I’m not really attracted to her seriously, yet I can recognize that she’s no longer the “little sister with a psychotic smile” in Momusu but one of the prettier, more sophisticated members. Which it scares the hell out of me that I would even venture to describe Koharu as sophisticated.

I hate to say this about Taka, because I do admire the classiness and singing prowess that she brings to the group (after loathing her for such a long time), but she bores me so much. I’ve just come to expect her to be nothing short of totally on track. Her pictures are good, she’s renowned for her singing talent, she emotes towards the camera decently, her dancing is exceptional… There’s not a lot of discrepancies with her. Other members of Momusu I’ll find things ‘wrong’ with, like sometimes somebody’s expression will be a little off in a picture, or their dancing/singing isn’t so great but they try regardless. Rarely have I seen Taka look peculiar in a photo, and this is either due to the fact that she’s been posing with UFA longer than anyone else in the current lineup, or she’s got her own ability at it. So I’m not surprised or wowed to see her on her game in this PV.

Another shot of Junjun, however brief it was. I like the intense expression she has here, and her…frighteningly prominent neck/collarbone muscles? Jesus.

Risa doesn’t really excite me. I like what she adds vocally to the songs, she’s a great singer for being in an idol group (like Taka), but her overall persona and jovial childishness… It’s just Not My Thing. There are still moments where I see her and am thoroughly impressed, however, so at least she has that much…? IDK.

As I’ve said before, I noticed eighth-gen was getting quite a bit of screentime in the PV. Aika definitely received a lot for the rapping segments, Junko got normal, plain shots interspersed throughout the PV. But what about Linlin? I’ve watched “Nanchatte Renai” a dozen times and I always finish it feeling as if she were strangely absent. It kind of sucks, because she’s proven what a fantastic performer she is (her track record is nothing to sneeze at) and I don’t want her to take backseat to even her fellow generation members (I guess you can call them Hachies? rofl IDK).

Re: ballerina moves. What the fuck is this?

Sayumi is an interesting member to me. She recently made an appearance on a show called London Hearts (here is a link to a detailed summary from Hello! Online’s forums) and was in the bottom three as to which girl on the show would be the least fun to be with. As far as LH’s ranking system goes, the lower you are on a list of 1-10, the more favorable a position you’re in. So Sayumi snagging #3 on that list is…fairly shitty. What grabbed me the most about that whole detailed summary is how Koda Kumi’s sister, misono, really seemed to get to her. One of the people on the show made a comment about Sayumi that was to the effect of that she likely needs someone to tell her how cute she is constantly or she’ll start getting depressed. Sayumi agreed to this and elaborated that she wants to hear the other Musume reassure her of this trait, which basically screams insecurity. It shines a whole new light on Sayumi’s overpowering idol character, and gives us some insight into what kind of person she really is. It also helps explain Sayu’s sometimes biting sarcasm (fondly referred to as “Dark Sayu”), that she really is somewhat wounded and defensive on the inside.

I got into Momusu around the time Aika had initially been accepted into the group. She wasn’t a good singer back then (although I enjoyed the fact that even if her voice was pitchy, I felt it showed promise). Since hearing her on the marriage cover album, I can say without doubt that she’s improved substantially and will likely continue to do so! I can’t say whether or not she’ll be Taka or Linlin someday, but she’s not a total bust at the singing thing, so there’s a possibility. She’s not too fantastic at the whole dancing thing, and a girl’s gotta have something she’s good at.

On a more shallow note, though… I’ll be damned if Aika isn’t one of the less ~gorgeous~ Musume. I hate to say it, but it’s true. This makes her somewhat more versatile than anyone else, however: she can and has looked very pretty in a variety of pictures I’ve seen, yet her more subdued and almost boyish features lend her some ability to take on that role as lead rapper in this single. As I stated prior, Aika’s versatility is her strongest asset. Sometimes she gets a bit annoying, but that just comes with her immaturity as a person.

I don’t know what it is about Eri, but I still feel that she would be an awesome girlfriend. She’s got this girl-next-door vibe, her smile is sweet as can be, she’s able to be funny and laugh at herself… And despite the fact that I usually tend to like singers with deeper ranges, Eri’s high, girlish voice almost always gets to me, you know? In the Tanpopo# song, the way she sang one her lines towards the end made it sound as if she were about to cry, it was so full of emotion. Sometimes she gets a little pitchy, but she’s improved on that exponentially. And her vibrato is marvelous.

I also dig what a good dancer she is. Ever seen that video of her busting some moves to Christina Aguilera? It’s amazing. I really think she should pursue a career as a professional dancer in her future after Momusu, because the girl just has groove.

See, shots like these make me fall in love with Risa. But they also make me question where her eyebrows went.

Taka does some sort of extraneous hand gesture(s) in basically every PV she’s in anymore. Sometimes it’s annoying, sometimes it works, but all I can do is sit here and wonder if she’s a big fan of Beyonce or something.

Morning Musume members don’t play with their hair nearly as often as they should.

One major problem I have with the song is also the fact that Koharu and Sayumi, two of our worst singers, get solo lines. I realize they’re also two of the most popular members, but their vocals drag everything down for me. Koharu stayed good for a majority of her lines, right until she hit that “detekiteru” and the “mitai” just…sealed the deal. This girl is the weakest link. At least she can dance decently and, as I said before, is pretty.

I included this chiefly because it just struck me how lolita-esque their outfits look. It’s an interesting fashion on Momusu, but one of these days I’d really like to see no-frills costumes. Like maybe they have a Denim Wednesday at the Up-Front office or something and everyone has to fish out their old, possibly ripped jeans from their closets. (This is a fantasy I have of Momusu. Wearing denim. Yeeeeah…)

Oh, Reina.

I don’t understand this choreography at all. I mean, they obviously had to do something when that R&B beat comes in to signal the beginning of one of the rap portions, but that? That looks like they all have bad stomachaches or something. Or constipation. Totally not cool.

Aika stole the show for me when it came to the rap. I was so impressed by her in the PV especially, and I’m not 100% why. Probably because of those fly moves she does when they start it, and she usually fails choreography execution (though only when you compare her to our Fab Four dancers, otherwise I’m sure she could kick my ass at it).

Surprise Junko again. I swear, she’s in here more than Linlin is.

Taka is having sexual relations with a pillar in that warehouse.

All sarcasm aside, though, I actually kind of like these closeups because they’re way more interesting than ones you typically come across in the idol genre. UFA finally went to a Japanese Wal-Mart and purchased a large fan, so that’s creating a very nice and elegant atmosphere, the lighting is superbly done, and the manner in which Taka works the pillar is more “creative” than what you find in Momusu’s PVs nowadays. It all pulls together for an aesthetically-pleasing finish, and ups my enjoyment significantly.

Of course, I can’t believe I just wrote a bunch of detailed shit to elaborate on why I enjoy Taka molesting a pillar. Wow.

I absolutely love how Reina conveys her “enjite mo” line here. The slight narrowing of her eyes as she stresses the ‘ji’, the angle of her face in relation to the camera… It’s the most badass I think I’ve seen her since she first joined and had that amazing spiky black hairdo.

BTW, I’ve noticed my enjoyment of Reina increases by 85% when her hair is down. She just seems so much more honest that way.

Junjun again. Hi, Junjun.

LMAO, Junjun in the background! But there’s Eri being gorgeous per usual.

Reina is kind of in the same boat as Taka. I have nothing really to critique of her in this PV because it’s the same old shit. I’ve never cared much for her singing so I can’t bitch about that, and she’s not particularly attractive to me and never has been. The only thing I can make note of is when she does something I like.

Hey, it’s Linlin! This is only the second time I’ve seen her in the ENTIRE PV.

These are easily the most stunning closeup shots I’ve seen in any Momusu PV to date. I swear to god, I don’t care how lame and boring the background is, it just works. Though I will say as much: Tsunku, please refrain from including the word “hamburger” in a sad song. Thank you.

I loved the execution of Sayumi’s solo lines. The way in which she sort of “took the center stage” and did her little dance and hand motions, as if she were born to be there despite all evidence pointing otherwise, was brilliant.

I can’t get enough of these, I swear to you.

Of course, my friend absolutely adores Sayu and requested that I take many nice caps of her. Which I did.

Third Linlin sighting. Nice.

LOL, the way Aika looks in that cap is totally wrong, but when you see the actual scene play out, it just looks so right. And the part where Koharu punches the air as they go “oh yeah” should be one of those Momusu memes like Rika’s monologue, Taka’s Fukui accent, Sayumi’s “shabondama!” (and now, I suppose, her “aisou warai”), etc.

This is another shot of Risa that makes me like her a whole lot more than I usually do. She reminds me of those fabulous R&B queens. Completely rocking the wind effects.

Blink and, yes, you will miss her. Fourth Linlin sighting. She’s almost like a rare marsupial in the great Outback.

Junko again. My BB is all over this PV.

LMFAO, Linlin’s expression is gold here. She looks like she’s thinking “what the fuck is going on?”.

R&B goddess. I TOLD YOU.

Eri’s hair does the most amazing thing ever here. I could spend eternity watching that looped.

I am the Batman.

I love this shot of Risa, too. I swear, we are going to have some of the most gorgeous member-specific closeup videos ever. “Nanchatte Renai” Junjun version, anyone?

Junko again. I’m now slightly frightened at how she’s managed to ghost around the PV like an ethereal being. What amazing person put this together, and can I take him/her out to lunch sometime?

Why is Aika in the front of dance shots lately? She was in “Shouganai Yume Oibito”’s, too. She’s not that good of a dancer. Stop it.

Please don’t do this. Only one person is singing. We don’t need to see all of them.

This picture is the extent of how pretty I will ever find Tanaka Reina to be.

Anyway, the rest of the PV isn’t really all that notable. I see Linlin one more time (for a grand total of five sightings, nice!), people dance a little bit more, the instrumental is moderately annoying, we get spammed with the last glimpses of the white outfits (this time with an added silhouette!), Taka says her big “honmono ni” line…

Oh. Well. I suppose this is quite notable, in itself.